THE GOOD LIFE BLOG
THE GOOD LIFE BLOG
HOW TO USE DOWNTIMES TO MOVE FORWARD IN YOUR LIFE AND START LIVING WITH INTENTION
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I originally started on a different article that I had intended to post here on my blog, but that was before the coronavirus affected us all. All of a sudden, the world as we know it completely changed. The freedom that so many of us took for granted, the opportunities that were everywhere, seem to have vanished overnight. Many people are in a panic state of mind, and maybe you're one of them. You worry - about getting seriously ill, about whether or not you'll have enough food to get by, about your job, about your economy ...
There's no doubt about it: These are challenging times. Many industries are seriously affected by this, especially the travel industry, - and businesses might have to shut down permanently as a result of the situation. People may lose their jobs, and thereby their main income, if the quarantine situation has to go on for weeks and months ahead. Of course you're worried!
And of course we must take this seriously. We must all do what we can to reduce the risk of this becoming a long-time situation. We must follow the instructions that the health authorities give us, and stay away from personal contact with other people as much as we can. Home quarantine is necessary in this situation, and we all have to accept that.
If you have a family, staying at home for weeks and maybe even months, can be a real challenge. Kids and parents alike need positive things to do, and at the same time, you all need time and space as individuals. Some alone-time. Depending on your living conditions, this can be a challenge and really take a toll on all of you. There's no question about that. And in this particular situation, which is different from anything we've experienced in times of peace, - FEAR is a big factor that needs to be addressed.
FEAR is something that feels very real for all of us. We all have fears. But if you think of FEAR as "False Evidence Appearing Real", you may have a chance of breaking through them.
Life has always been uncertain
If you think about your life up until now, you might be of the opinion that you've never really been afraid or had any real danger in your life before now. Truth is: You've been surrounded by danger all your life, on a daily basis. Even before the Coronavirus outbreak, the world has always been uncertain.
Just think about it: You've never been able to know for certain what the next minute, hour, day, month or year would bring. At any time in your life, there's been a possibility that you could learn that someone you love has just died, or you could have a car accident, or be diagnosed with a disease, or lose your job.
That's a fact.
Uncertainty has always been there. You just haven't thought about it on a daily basis. Because ... that's life, isn't it? If we were to think about all the potential threats all the time, we wouldn't be able to function. So we create stories about our life that serve us better. We plan for tomorrow, for next week, for our next holiday, like we would live forever. And that's good. That's normal. That's our survival mechanisms, and they usually work very well.
So even if the situation around the Coronavirus is somewhat out of the ordinary, there's really no more uncertainty in this world now than what there's always been and always will be. This, too, shall pass.
I hope this can help you put it all into perspective. FEAR is part of life itself.
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Feed you mind with positive insights and strategies
Even the people who seem most courageous, have fear. You see: Courage is not absence of fear, but mastery of it. This means that we can all learn to master our fear. Because the fear is really all in our mind.
"Fear itself is a creation of your mind. It does not exist independently.
Since it is a fabrication, you don’t have to fight it. Just understand it. Understanding is the key to freedom." - The Ancient Sage
Your brain is wired to keep you safe.
Tony Robbins says that a good way to fight fear, is to read. "Feed your mind with strategies and tools that you can use. You can't hope that good ideas will drop from the sky and come to you. Good ideas must be pursued."
And if you make it a habit to read a little every day, - and especially if you choose to read books that you can learn something from, - you will soon find that you'll gain wisdom and insights that can change your life and help you see things in a more positive light. Knowledge makes you feel less afraid. Fear disappears.
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Also be aware of what your outer environment is feeding you. Reduce the time you spend reading or listening to negative news, or listening to negative thoughts of people around you, however well-meaning they might be. They may have good intentions, like keeping you safe from harm, but they can also limit you and create fear in you. Like Tony Robbins says: "Stand guard at the door of your mind! Because what's getting in there is shaping you."
So if you really want to feel happy and fulfilled and overcome fear, feeding your mind with positive insights and strategies is the #1 tool. If you don't really like to read books, you can listen to books instead. There are lots of Apps for this nowadays, and I won't promote any particular app here, but Amazon Kindle, Audible, Goodreads and Storytel are some of them if you need a few names to get you started.
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This is a good time to audit your life
If your life up until this point has been dominated by stress and worries and a feeling of not having the life that you really want, this time of home quarantine can actually turn out to be a blessing in disguise for you, because now you've actually got a wonderful opportunity to take stock of where you are in life and create a new beginning for yourself.
Instead of focusing on your fear and worrying about what might happen in this pandemic situation, I suggest that you sit back and take a good look at your life. Find a nice place to sit, light a candle, brew yourself a nice cup of tea ... whatever you need to do to feel good and relaxed, and make sure you're not disturbed for a while. If you're on your own, mute your phone and close down social media and other distractions, and then just sit there quietly for a while and try to calm your mind.
First, if you're struggling, remember these things:
1) You've survived every difficulty you've experienced so far.
2) The best day of your life is still to come - and it will.
3) There are still people you haven't met, places you haven't seen and
things you haven't done, but rest assured: You will experience them all.
This, too, shall pass.
Then ask yourself these questions (and you might want to write this down in a journal or notebook to bring more clarity):
1) Where am I in my life right now? What's my situation?
2) Why am I not happy with the way may life is?
3) How do I want my life to be instead? What do I want it to look like?
What would make me really happy?
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Start living with intention by changing one thing at a time
Just reflect upon these few questions for now. A total life audit might take a little more time, and to not get overwhelmed by it, I suggest you just start with getting clarity around these important questions. Because to be able to plan for the future and start living with intention, you first need to know what your starting point is. Sounds reasonable, right?
Then, when you've gained this clarity, I suggest that - as a first step towards living with intention - you make a decision about ONE thing that you're not satisfied with the way it is now, and that you intend to change on a daily basis. ONE thing that you can change right now, while you're in confinement in your home. You can do this! It doesn't have to be hard. Actually, it might even turn out to be FUN!
Changing a habit isn't done from one day to another. Statistics have shown that we need 90 days to do that. That's why you should try not to make too many changes at the same time, but stick to changing ONE before you move on to the next. And make it do-able. Especially if it's a rather BIG change. Then you might need to break it down into smaller steps and do one step at a time until you've managed to change the thing you had in mind.
For example: If you need to change your financial situation, lose weight or work on your marriage, you will of course need to make small changes over a period of time. But once you've gained clarity about what the change need to be, you've already started moving in the right direction and have every possibility of accomplishing what you really want.
I've written several articles earlier about how you should trust your inner GPS, how your thoughts create your reality, why mind control is important, what you should do to start managing your money in a better way, and about goalsetting, just to mention a few. I suggest you click on the links and read them as well. I think you might find them useful. And while you're at it, I suggest you scroll down and read some more articles, now that you have plenty of time on your hands to start filling your mind with things that can help you live with intention.
This is your time. Use it to your benefit! This can be the best day and the best time of the rest of your life.
See you soon, I hope! We're all in this together!
If you liked this blog post, feel free to leave a comment below and maybe share it with someone else that you think might enjoy it, too.
I also invite you to join my tribe, The Sisterhood of Female Life Designers, which is absolutely FREE, of course! When you do, you'll get instant access to The Female Life Designer's Manifesto, which can help you get right on track to living your life with intention. Join today! I'll be delighted to get to know you!